", , whenhetoldmethatifDmitriFyodorovitchwereconvictedhewouldescapeabroadwiththatcreature, Ifeltfuriousatonce—Ican'ttellyouwhy, Idon'tknowmyselfwhy....Oh, ofcourse, Iwasfuriousthenaboutthatcreature, andthatshe, too, shouldgoabroadwithDmitri!" KaterinaIvanovnaexclaimedsuddenly, herlipsquiveringwithanger."AssoonasIvanFyodorovitchsawthatIwasfuriousaboutthatwoman, , ...andwhenImyselfhadtoldhimlongbeforethatIdidnotloveDmitri, thatIlovednoonebuthim! , ontheeveningyoucame, hebroughtmeasealedenvelope, whichIwastoopenatonce, , heforesawhisillness! Hetoldmethattheenvelopecontainedthedetailsoftheescape, andthatifhediedorwastakendangerouslyill, , nearlytenthousand—thosenotestowhichtheprosecutorreferredinhisspeech, , andwasconfidingthisplanofescapetome, , thatwasasacrifice! No, youcannotunderstandthegreatnessofsuchself-sacrifice, , butIthoughtatoncethathewouldtakeitonlyformyjoyatthethoughtofMitya'sbeingsaved (andhecertainlywouldhaveimaginedthat!), andIwassoexasperatedatthemerepossibilityofsuchanunjustthoughtonhispartthatIlostmytemperagain, andinsteadofkissinghisfeet, flewintoafuryagain! Oh, Iamunhappy! It'smycharacter, myawful, unhappycharacter! Oh, youwillsee, Ishallendbydrivinghim, too, toabandonmeforanotherwithwhomhecangetonbetter, ...no, Icouldnotbearit, , andwhenIcalledtoyouandtoldhimtocomeback, Iwassoenragedbythelookofcontemptandhatredheturnedonmethat—doyouremember?—Icriedouttoyouthatitwashe, healonewhohadpersuadedmethathisbrotherDmitriwasamurderer! , , itwasIwhopersuadedhim! Oh, myviletemperwasthecauseofeverything! , andthat, evenifIlovedhisbrother, ...Iamthecauseofitall, Ialoneamtoblame!"
